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Be Romantic

Being romantic means something different to each couple.
We have our own history together.
Our unique love story.

Now that you’ve been humble and vulnerable with each other, think about what drew you together in the first place.
Remember those beginning days of love?
What attracted you to each other?
Her eyes?
His smile?
The way she listened to everything you said?
The way his face lit up when you entered the room?

Start simply.
Hold hands.
Go for long walks and talk—a lot.
Get to know each other again.
Do some of the things that drew you together.
When you were dating did you go out to dinner?
Did you go to the movies?
Spend as much time together as you can.
And cling.

Walking and talking was a huge part of our marriage restoration.
And in the years ahead, it would become a big part of our love story.
You can certainly sit and talk.
But walking together, hands linked, or arms around each other provides a shared adventure and an opening of hearts as you tell stories and laugh.
Do laugh! Laughter is healing.
And soon, if you’re like us, you will feel yourself bonding together again.
It won’t be the same as when you were dating.
But it will be something new and sweet, linking the past, the present, and your future together.

I need romance like I need air.
It’s part of who I am.
It’s part of my love story with my husband.
You should romance your spouse in the way he/she needs.
Does she like roses?
Does she like to dress up and go somewhere fancy with you?
Does he like you to bake him a cheesecake?
Be kind and do those things for each other.

Allow time for your romance to blossom.
Talk about what each of you would like to do/what each of you needs.
Allow for surprises.
After 40 years of marriage, I still enjoy being romanced.

You, as a couple, are on a journey.
You will have storms.
But you can get through them—together.
When the going gets rough, consider these steps: be humble, be vulnerable, and be romantic.
Your marriage is worth every bit of effort you put into it.
After weathering some storms, your relationship can be even stronger.

You are in a beautiful love story.
The two of you.
As long as you both shall live.
Watch a sunrise.

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Mary Hanks writes inspirational Christian fiction about couples finding their way back to grace and each other.

Note from the author: I’m not a counselor. I’m just a girl with a mended heart who’s weathered a few of life’s storms.